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  • After my lovely walk in the park, I decided to head home via the road rather than the trail. Usually it's totally dangerous, with old men in crisis cars and middle aged soccer moms in high-end SUV's tearing around the corners like they're slaloleming (wait, is that a word?) down a black diamond slope. And usually there's an assortment of road kill strewn out like a buffet for the turkey vultures that hang in the 'hood. (I keep waiting for them to gobble, but they never do. ) But today I decided to walk up the hill. No one hit me with their car, or their bike for that matter. And I saw no dead animals, not even one. What I did see was a dead pair of nylon pantyhose. With the panties still wrapped inside. To the lady that "lost" them - hot damn! Hope it was fun!

  • You know it's summer when the sunless tanning liquid comes out. Tried a new kind, and while it smells better [i.e. less like sweat] than the other ones I've used, it also is shimmery. I look like a middle-aged woman trying way-too-hard to look like a tan teen queen. Not quite the look I was aiming for...

  • And, right on schedule, the warm weather makes me want to try tasty adult beverages. If I had an ounce of impetus, I'd totally try these. Paying particular attention to steps 2 and 4.

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